2026-10-23
Good morning, Dear Ones,
The Holy Spirit directs me to continue writing more about loving, responsible discipling of our children and teenagers. In an emotionally healthy home, toddlers must be carefully taught such simple truths as to not run out in a busy street, not to eat things which are not safe to eat, and not to toss things about causing destruction. There isn’t a parent in the world who hasn’t watched a 1 ½ year old try to do some of these things. PR 13: 24, “He who spares his rod hates his son, but he who loves him disciplines him promptly.” No one is suggesting that we use a rod against our children, but a hand on the backside to get his attention can prevent a tragedy, particularly when there has been open rebellion. If this kind of correction is done consistently and with the child’s welfare in mind, the lesson normally gets across.
The Lord says in EPH 6: 4, “Father’s do not provoke your children to wrath but bring them up in the training and admonition of the Lord.” The oft-used question applies here: “What would Jesus do?” An older child needs to understand limits and boundaries, if he is to develop the sense that everyone has simple limits and boundaries consistently in the family. For teenagers, the loss of driving or other privileges or other temporary grounding should suffice in the face of an infraction, if discipline has been lovingly, responsibly, and consistently applied in the family. It must be understood that such a teenager doesn’t have enough life experience to be completely autonomous yet. That teenager hasn’t had the responsibilities of an adult. Certainly, that doesn’t mean that a child or teenager’s creativity or growing independence should be quashed. COL 3: 21, “Fathers, do no provoke your children, lest they become discouraged.”
Picking the right time to discipline a child or teenager makes a difference. When a parent disciplines a child in a fit of anger, no one learns anything. I remember an incident when a mother was yelling at her little daughter in the middle of a store. The child was so embarrassed that it brought her to tears amidst all the onlookers in the store. I was thinking to myself that a precious teaching moment was being lost because of that mother’s temper. When our emotions are high, a lot of emotional destruction can be done. Responsible adults will wait till they are in control of themselves before dealing with misbehavior. Correcting with patience and avoiding anger or harshness, if done consistently and fairly reinforces God’s standards. Read JAS 3: 5-10, which gives the Lord’s perspective. When love for that child is the motivation, he will learn to love in return and especially, learn to love the Lord. PR 3: 11-12, “My son, do not despise the Lord’s discipline and do not resent His rebuke, because the Lord disciplines those He loves, as a father the son He delights in.” (While the Bible uses the language pointing to males, all these verses also apply to females).
Teaching by example is essential. The Lord’s discipline applies to adults as well as children and teens. For example, we always had a rule that our children had to let my husband and I know where they were and when to expect them home when they were out. If plans unavoidably changed, they were expected to call home to let us know, so we wouldn’t worry. We tried to live by a few important habits like that and would have a discussion with our children if there were an infraction once they were home. Everyone, even the adults in the family, were expected to obey that rule. Too many rules, or rules that are inconsistent only produce confusion. IS 54: 13, “All your children shall be taught be the Lord, and great shall be the peace of your children.”
Teaching children to tell the truth is another major lesion that the Lord emphasizes. A child whose back is up against the wall due to too harsh parenting is always on the defensive. He retreats into a dream world of his own making and lies to gain power over his life. All too many adults have been raised this way. 3 JN 1: 4, “I have no greater joy than to heard that my children walk in truth,” says the Lord. Lying if not corrected early can lead to serious problems. PR 1: 8, “My son, hear the instruction of your father, and do not forsake the law of your mother.”
PRAYER: Our Dearest Lord, You want us to honor our parents by being obedient to them. As a parents and grandparents, we beseech You to guide us in the most difficult task You have given us. EPH 5: 22-23 has instructed married adults who are parents to submit ourselves to our mates. Responsible fathers are the heads of households “as Christ is the Head of the church.” Husbands are told to love their wives, in vs 25, “as Christ loved the church and gave Himself up for her…” These admonitions set the foundation for righteous parenting. This kind of parenting also should include praise where and when it is due for children who listen, love You, and do good deeds. While finding this balance isn’t easy, we appeal to You for Your guidance. We offer You our love, devotion, hearts open to Your teaching, thanks and praise, in the holy/mighty name of Jesus Christ. Amen.
NEXT WEEK: The Holy Spirit commands me to write about conflict resolution. Our children are blessings from God and deserve to be treated with responsible parenting. As challenging as parenting can be, the Lord tells us, “And let us not grow weary while doing good, for in due season we shall reap if we do not lose heart” [GA 6:9]. Love, discipline, teaching, leading by example, and encouraging faith are all necessary to rearing happy, responsible, and righteous adults. Thanksgiving and praise be to God!
Grace be with You Always,
Lynn, JS 24: 15
© Lynn Johnson 2026. All Rights Reserved.
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